A letter to 30 year old me:

I know, I know, it’s been less than 3 years since you hit this milestone, but believe me…a lot of life is going to happen between now and then. There’s some hard things I need to tell you, but I promise there’s a lot of good to tell you, too.

You’re getting ready to walk in an unexpectedly hard season. But when a rug gets pulled out from under you, you’ll learn exactly where to plant your feet. You’re going to experience new levels of anxiety and fear and doubt. But you are going to see that you are braver and stronger than you ever thought. You are going to have to make tough decisions and you’ll learn how to stand firm in them. Without these moments of hardship and trial, you wouldn’t need faith. And girl, your faith is about to grow exponentially as you learn to rely on God more than ever.

You’re going to experience so much healing and life in your community of friends…healing you didn’t even know you needed. But you’re also going to experience loss. It’s going to try to knock you down, but in it you’re going to find your confidence. You’re going to make mistakes, so you have to be willing to admit them and change some things. But God is really, really good at refining. You’re going to learn to trust yourself, and more than that you’ll learn to trust the Holy Spirit inside of you. You’ll learn what it means to truly love others and in turn let others in to truly love you, too. You’ve already come so far in learning to be yourself in relationships, but buckle up because there’s SO much more to learn. Please be willing. You’re going to be hurt and you’re going to cause hurt. But you have a choice of what you’re going to do with it. You won’t always get it right, but you have an unlimited resource of love and peace inside of you Who is going to walk you through it.

I wish I could give you a road map of how to actually get to the other side of the hard stuff and not have to trial and error it. But it wouldn’t be the same. You would hear it, but you wouldn’t truly know it. Because we can’t learn in the same way until we experience it. And I hate that you have to experience some of the things coming your way, but I’m also so excited for the work God is going to do in your heart. So I’ll just sum all of this up by saying: Trust Him. And don’t stop trusting Him. Sometimes it feels hard, but it’s worth it.

Love you. Mean it.

This post is part of a collaboration with Craving Connection Podcast. Check out their podcast episode 156 to hear their stories and why this practice can be so cathartic and helpful. Follow them on instagram for even more! I was a guest on episode 108 their podcast in 2019 if you’d like to check that out!

What’s something you would tell your past self? Share in the comments!

Letter to My Past Self